Is It Your Intuition or Someone Else's Projection?

Have you ever been in a conversation where someone's advice felt more about them than about you? Or caught yourself bringing yesterday's frustration into today's interaction? In this deeply insightful episode of "It Begins Here," host Jillian Johnson tackles the complex and often misunderstood concept of projection—and why mastering it is essential for healthy relationships and true self-awareness.

Drawing from her own experiences—a short relationship that taught her not to bring the past into new love, a psychic reading that revealed someone else's trauma instead of her truth, and navigating well-meaning but projecting loved ones—Jillian breaks down the many layers of projection. She explores how we project our own fears, hopes, and unresolved issues onto others, and how others do the same to us. More importantly, she offers a practical framework for recognizing projection in the moment and responding with grace, boundaries, and self-trust.

This episode is a masterclass in discernment: learning to ask, "Is this meant for me, or is this meant for them?" Whether you're navigating dating, family dynamics, or your own internal voice, Jillian's wisdom will help you show up more present, more authentic, and more free. Your journey to releasing what isn't yours begins here.

 Where love creates movement, and movement creates change. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

It's gonna be if it's meant to be, which I tell myself that all the time. But then leaving it and moving on to the next, and not carrying that into another relationship, not projecting the past. I was in a relationship and um it was short. Um, quite frankly, he was selfish, and he was trying to heal me, but he was hurting me, and that no, was not for me. But he did say something to me that I loved. Don't bring your past into this relationship. This is a brand new experience, and I loved that. I really do. And still, I still and I appreciate him for that. As a reminder, right? That's your past, it's not the present. Don't bring that forth. And that relationship, even short, was what it was. It was to teach me that. I go into relationships to be taught to experience. Well, Dia, and welcome to It Begins Here. It begins here as a podcast about my journey and path to enlightenment, healing, awareness, realizations, and all the fun little stories in between. So I welcome you to It Begins Here, a podcast. I want to talk about um the term projection, right? To project. And you can't tell someone else what they need to do and and when they need to do it. They have to figure it out on their own, right? It's like when I describe who I'm dating. Oh, how old is he? Oh, what does he do? Oh, and it's like it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because it's what I chose. It's what I've decided. And if it's a mistake, then it's something that I need to make to learn. I'm a grown ass woman. I want to make my decisions, and trust me, I think I think a lot before I make a decision. And I go with my gut too, right? Gotten a lot of practice around this. Understanding is a am I having a feeling, an emotion, right? Am I feeling something pressure, tense, chest clenching, lower back tension, right? It's like those are to me feelings, intuition, your gut, you just know. You're like, oh no, nope, nope, just no. It's like that heaviness. Um, it's it's tough to describe. It really is. And each individual has to recognize it. And each individual, like I said, has to go through their own process, their own journey. Because there's a lot of learning with the mistakes. There's a lot of learning with an experience, whether elated and wonderful or toxic. There's a lot to learn, and we have to take the time and have grace in making decisions and to block the noise. And I appreciate, you know, those who care for me and want to give me that feedback, my mother especially, right? But I know when someone's projecting. I actually had a reading once. Um, this woman was uh known for being her psychic and connection. And I had this reading, and I was going through the decision of divorcing Abby's dad and going through that process. Um, and the things that she told me I knew were not factual. I knew right away, and I realized that this woman was projecting her own life experience, drama, trauma on me. And it's in every facet of the world, whether it's a politician, whether it's a friend, a family member, whether it's a healer, whether it's a practitioner. We have to learn to recognize when it's not meant for us. And that's my point here of projection, right? You have to figure out if someone is really saying it specifically for you or explaining experience, like an experience of theirs themselves, of an experience that they had. And differentiating between that is a power in and of itself. Being able to say, You're projecting. I said it to my mother yesterday, you're projecting. And she's like, Yeah, I am. That's what I love about my mom. She'll she'll recognize, you know, that it's like, no, no, no, I am. But she means well. Like there's love behind it. I I can feel that, right? And knowing that, and then knowing when someone's projecting. And I've been th having space in my heart for someone for a long time, and it's time to release that, and I'm done holding space for that, and I'm going through my journey of releasing that, and there's projection in there too. There's projection of my own internal projection of the hope that what this can be, knowing that this person is clearly a connection, knowing when you're with someone and you just feel so alive, right? You're like, woof. But knowing when they're ready, and this person has not been ready at all. And I'm learning, you know, going through my journey and learning what's best for me, and what truly is meant for me, and what I deserve. And let me tell you, I deserve a lot. I love me, I have that awareness. I've had it all along, it's just so much stronger now. It is so much stronger, and I've walked away from this person multiple times to be like they're just not ready. Just walk away gracefully. But I'm angry with myself too for holding on the space and not not always being at the surface either, not realizing I'm holding space for this person and what to do. And honestly, the answer to that is just let go. Why hold space for someone that's not present? Right? And if it's meant to be, it's gonna be. And continue to focus on you and but be open to other love, right? So it projection is not just external, it's also internal. What are we projecting in our minds and our consciousness? What's in our subconscious, right? Projecting that. What does that look like? Projecting to me is literally mirroring. That's what projection means to me. But is it mirroring for your own self or is it mirroring of someone else? Are you are you doing this projection internally, externally? Is it someone else that's projecting onto you? I think a lot of racism comes around with projection. I think there's synergy between the two, is what I mean. I think that there's something there because people project their fears, right? They project other things, and projection is a lot. There's a lot to it. There's not just one way of thinking, there is not one way of experiencing, and that's why amongst all of this, the next time I encounter this person will not be carrying the negative, the baggage of the past. And I've done that so well with this person to be like, okay, are they ready? Is he present? He's not. No, okay. Keep going. And he projects me. I see a lot of myself in him, even from early on. His anger when he f gets all frustrated and freaks out, the way he runs away, the way he holds up a big wall in front of him.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

There's a lot that I see of myself in that. And it's a beautiful thing. It really is. Because it makes you aware. And then you have the realization of that's not me anymore. That's not me. And you let it go, right? You walk away.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

So we not only have others project onto us, but we also project ourselves. We project of our past, we project of what we expect in the future, right? It's a big projection.

SPEAKER_00 10:48

If you ask me. It's a big mirror.

SPEAKER_01 10:55

So going into any scenario, make sure you have some headspace. A lot of fights initiate because you're not present. You're bringing your experience from work, from a friend, from the coffee shop. Like, who knows? From on the road, there's a lot of crazy people driving and angry. And you're bringing that into the conversation. I've done it in meetings where I'm like bringing something in, and then I realize that I'm like, okay, let's recognize this and back it up here. We have to be careful of what we project. And it's okay to project, but do it in your own quiet way to process so you're not pushing it onto someone else. Right? You're there and you're present and you're listening. So really, it's again giving ourselves grace to be like, hold on, and I do this. My friends and loved ones will vouch for this. I say, wait a minute, hold on, I just need a moment. Hold on. I'm still out of, I'm still processing the last meeting. I'm still processing what I just discussed. I just had a thought. I just went back to the past for no reason whatsoever. Right? And take a moment to pause and be like, hold on, okay, now go. What were you telling me? What were you saying? And I apologize. I'm here. I'm present. Because we can project. Right? You step into a conversation, then you see the person just look at you like, what is going on? What are they talking about? And you're like, oh, I'm projecting. Here I am. So in communicating with others, we have to recognize, are we present in this conversation? And then during the conversation, when they ask for your opinion, or they ask for your opinion of their scenario, we have to stop and make sure that we're interpreting what they're experiencing versus bringing forth what our past, our trauma, or what we just experienced two seconds ago, five minutes ago, a year ago, an hour ago, right? Being able to project, and and we're all going through something. Like I said, I'm finally releasing, recognizing and releasing this person that is not no longer serving me, involved, contributing. And it's gonna be if it's meant to be, which I tell myself that all the time. But then leaving it and moving on to the next, and not carrying that into another relationship, not projecting the past. I was in a relationship and um it was short. Um, quite frankly, he was selfish, and he was trying to heal me, but he was hurting me, and that no, was not for me. But he did say something to me that I loved. Don't bring your past into this relationship. This is a brand new experience, and I loved that. I really do. And still, I still and I appreciate him for that. As a reminder, right? That's your past, it's not the present. Don't bring that forth. And that relationship, even in short, was what it was. It was to teach me that. I go into relationships to be taught to experience. I'm no longer going into relationships going, is this the is this the last one? Is this is it him? Is it it's like, oh my god, that's so much pressure. For me, for them, right? I'm going into this as a new experience. Okay, what you got? What are you gonna teach me? What are we gonna experience? What am I gonna learn from you? What am I gonna learn of myself? Will I set the boundaries? Will I speak my mind? Will I be kind and loving? Will I be open? Because that's what I've been doing in many relationships since my divorce. And some will think, you know, whatever they think, and who cares? My god, you're dating so many men. Oh my god, like what are you doing? You're never satisfied. Oh my it's like, what? That's projection. That's you. I'm going into this learning, experiencing. And that's my choice, that's my decision. Right? There's the projection. How old is he? Oh, he's too young. It's like, what? Like, let me decide that. I okay, so now, and you know me, oh, my throat chakra is strong. I will say, well, you're projecting, and that's something for you, not me. And no, thank you. Right? My god, you're gonna love me or hate me. Because I'm just gonna speak my mind in a kind way, but reverse it back. I'm not here to ask for advice. Sometimes I just need to process an event and speak out loud. And sometimes someone will try and give you advice, and you're like, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what I'm asking for. I know what it is I have or need. I don't require that, right? It's knowing and it's saying, and it's listening, it's being patient, right? Giving grace for the conversation, for the relationship, for whatever whatever you're experiencing. But we must be present and learn. Is this meant for me or is this meant for them? Am I bringing something from the past and projecting? Just start asking questions. Let's just ask a bunch of questions. I'm in a current relationship and he it's someone I had dated in the past. And he said to me, like, Why did you leave? Why did you and I and I blocked him. I blocked him because he would not take no. He wanted to not let go. And I was dating someone else at the time, you know. I redirected because he we were it's it was lovely at first, and then the disconnection he was processing. I don't know, I felt him stepping back, and so I just wanted to let him do it. I no longer chase, I rarely did chase, but I know when nope, you're not. Now you're just noise. And and then I realized that he never gave up. He continued to be like, no, I was wrong.

SPEAKER_00 18:39

I want to move forward.

SPEAKER_01 18:41

I recognize, I'm aware. Sometimes you're just gonna let give people space. Now, is this relationship the end-all relationship? No, I don't know. No, I'm gonna say no. My gut says no.

SPEAKER_00 18:54

It's not, it's an experience. And I will give love and receive love.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

That's again my ultimate mission in life. In this life. I want to give and receive love. I don't want other people's projections.

SPEAKER_00 19:17

I don't want to do something that I know is not meant for me. I don't want to continue on something that is not contributing. And waiting and holding and hoping. I want to take time for me to process.

SPEAKER_01 19:37

I want to communicate what I desire and how I feel.

SPEAKER_00 19:44

And sometimes that's gonna make people uncomfortable, and quite frankly, I don't give a shit.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

You have to do what's right for you so you can be present and loving for the next, right? We are all on a journey of of ourselves. That's why I have my course. It's like I gotta teach this. I need to contribute. We have multiple courses with Simply J and and under the Peely umbrella, but my course from necessary to the unimaginable, and that's what it's called. From necessary to the unimaginable is my course. And it's about all of this. The awareness of oneself. If you don't have awareness of yourself to know what's right for you, what's meant for you, what's not meant for you, they're projecting. This isn't for me, happens all the time. I find Virgos especially. I'm sorry if that hurts Virgos, but they're loving, beautiful creatures, Virgos, always giving, always contributing. But they need to take time for themselves and to learn and understand themselves because when they don't they're self-destructive. And many humans and many other signs, horoscope signs are too, let's face it. But I find Virgos project and it's like, hold on, that's not meant for me. That's you. And there's just a different way of saying it, right? Well, my experience was this, it might not be yours, right? Instead of, you're obsessive.

SPEAKER_00 21:45

Why are you dating younger men? Why did you decide to do this?

SPEAKER_01 21:54

They they make up a decision and they already think they have the answer, but they don't. They don't. Because the only person who has the answer is yourself. And again, I love Virgos. I'm surrounded by them, by the way. Maybe that's why. I see a lot of it. I'm moms of Virgo. I have many close friends and loving friends that are Virgos. I love them all, but I've noticed, especially of the signs, they can be very self-destructive. But they have to focus on themselves and love themselves because they should be loved, because they give so much love. It's like Mother Earth, right? Virgos are earth signs. I associate them with Mother Earth all the time because they have this beautiful heart and they give. But then I always push back as a Scorpio, which I know they love. What about you? What are you doing for you? Is that meant for you? I think this is for you, not me. You're projecting. And it's okay. I'm not gonna get angry. I'm just stating a fact. Scorpios, man, we say like it is. There's no fluff. It is what it is. And you should listen, yes. Because we do have something behind there that's helpful. I can guarantee you. Are we ever wrong? Rarely. No, I'm just kidding. Of course we are. Of course we are. But yeah, we have that stabbing truth saying of like, no, no, no, no, no. Nope, you're projecting. And we can look at you straight dead in the face without even blinking, which I know is pretty scary. We can just do that. God, I love me. God, I love being a Scorpio. I love my Gemini moon. I love my Sag rising because I show up and I'm engaging Scorpios. We want to be in a corner and just watch everybody and stare and observe and learn, right? Geminis, where you know those, yep, they'll integrate. They'll definitely integrate, but they love their alone time. They're creative as shit. Love my creative Gemini moon. Love it, love it. But projection. We have to be careful. Especially as practitioners and healers, by the way. I'm building Pele P Y L I wellness slowly, and they are the beautiful practitioners. I work with these people. I know what they're capable of and where they are. I know that they have good intentions and purpose. That's why we're building that nice and slow. There's no rush, not everyone can come. No. Especially as a practitioner. You get a lot of people that we need to heal and support. There's no projecting our opinions of what spirituality is. No, absolutely not. If someone believes in God but we believe in source, it's the same thing, by the way. But you can't redirect them to say source instead of God. No, absolutely not. People get to believe whatever they choose with their purpose. We're all connected anyway. It's all the same thing. It's so beautiful. But yes, especially the practitioners and healers, be careful of projection. Especially to all you beautiful humans, be aware and careful with projection. It is very powerful. I love you. It begins here. Thanks for listening. Love and light to all you beautiful humans.